Save the Date: White Collar Support Group 300th Meeting — Online on Zoom. Monday, March 14, 2022, 7 pm ET, 6 pm CT, 5 pm MT, 4 pm PT
Save the Date: White Collar Support Group — 300th Meeting Online on Zoom. Monday, March 14, 2022, 7 pm ET, 6 pm CT, 5 pm MT, 4 pm PT. Open to directly justice impacted only. Referrals welcome.
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Dear Fellow Travelers,
Progressive Prison Ministries and St. Joseph’s Mission Church invite you to join our Confidential Online White Collar Support Group. We hold our group meetings on Monday evenings, 7 pm ET. 6 pm CT, 5 pm MT, 4 pm PT.
We are doing something truly groundbreaking! This is the world’s first Confidential Online White Collar Support Group. As this support group is run by ordained clergy as part of a program of pastoral care and confession, we expect and believe it falls under clergy privilege laws.
We are a community of individuals, families and groups with white collar justice issues who have a desire to take responsibility for our actions and the wreckage we caused, make amends, and move forward in new way of life centered on hope, care, compassion, tolerance and empathy. Our experience shows us that many of us are suffering in silence with shame, remorse, and deep regret. Many of us have been stigmatized by our own families, friends and communities, and the business community. Our goal is to learn and evolve into a new spiritual way of life and to reach out in service to others. This is an important thing we are doing!
Over 400 Fellow Travelers have participated in our support group meetings from Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, District of Columbia, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Texas, Utah, Vermont, Virginia, Washington and Wisconsin — and Canada, South America, Europe and the Caribbean. All have agreed this has been a valuable, important experience in which everyone feels less alone, and gratified in the opportunity to talk about things in a safe space only we could understand.
We have formed agreements as to confidentiality, anonymity and civility, and have a basic agenda for each meeting:
1. Welcome
2. Serenity Prayer:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
3. Short Member Introductions, if we have new member(s)
4. Announcements & Resource Sharing
5. Guest Speaker and/or Lead on Topic
6. Member Sharing
7. Closing
Login Instructions and Link are sent out weekly. We have set up an account with Zoom for our group, and you can log in via video on a computer, tablet or smart phone that is equipped with a camera, or audio only via phone. Please use headphones if you can so that we can minimize feedback and background noise. Each meeting will have a different meeting number to best provide confidentiality.
For Newcomers, I (or the night’s host) will be online fifteen minutes before the scheduled start of the meeting. Zoom works wonderfully, however, it might take a little time to get comfortable with on your end if you’ve never been on this platform.
Thank you for referring other justice-impacted people and families: [email protected]. Fellow Traveler volunteers handle information requests and intakes with empathy and compassion.
Email for Trulincs/Corrlinks: [email protected].
Press & media inquiries: [email protected]. A Fellow Traveler volunteer who is a public relations professional handles these inquiries.
If you have suggestions for other Fellow Travelers to join this group, please contact us to discuss. Our goal is to be inclusive.
IMPORTANT!: If you are currently on supervised release, probation or parole, it is important that you first discuss this with your P.O. To assist in this regard, information about our ministry is available on prisonist.org.
Please feel free to contact us if you would like to join in our next meeting, or with any questions you might have regarding this group, its meetings, or anything else whatsoever.
For more information: [email protected]
Media inquiries: [email protected]
White Collar Support Group: My Holiday Message, from Jeff Grant
Dear Fellow Travelers,
Each year I send out a holiday message to our members. This year, it has been very difficult to find the right words.
For the past couple of months, I have been overwhelmed with gratitude and wonder, mixed with ample doses of fear and anxiety. So I entered a period of contemplation, reflection, and discernment. And as I emerge to start the new year, the spirit has compelled me to send you a very personal message.
My gratitude runs so deep for all the blessings that have been given to us. It seems impossible that we, whose lives have been brought to the brink, would have much to be grateful for. And yet, I’m sure that’s the way it works. I know I couldn’t be truly grateful until I had lost everything, and then had the opportunity to start my life anew.
My new life has been a gift, no longer shackled by the chains of trauma from my dysfunctional childhood family and from other people’s expectations; I bought into it all, even though deep down inside I knew it wasn’t right for me. That it was killing me. The crushing weight of materialism, pieces of me being cleaved off bit by bit, year by year, allowing things to get more and more complicated. Eventually, I was on autopilot, doing whatever I had to do to maintain that unsustainable trajectory and to survive. Ignoring the consequences. Or, more likely, encouraging the consequences. Until I couldn’t do it any longer and I just wanted the madness to stop.
So I threw a hand grenade into my life and dove on it. It mortally wounded me, and the wreckage to my family and all I held dear was unimaginable. Like the tornadoes we see on television all too often these days, the vestiges of my life were here one minute and gone the next.
And yet, what I didn’t know is that God and nature perform miracles every day. Today’s wildfire is tomorrow’s meadow, teeming with life and possibilities. Little microbes feeding new ecosystems that grow into new and different forests. It’s been like that since the beginning of time. But, in our fear and arrogance, we think we can control things, that it is our fault, that we will never recover.
One day, when I was feeling most afraid and most alone, I reached out to another person who was going through a journey similar to mine. Or, at least I thought he might be. At the time there was no information available anywhere. Nothing online, nothing anywhere. Vapor. But I risked it and made that phone call. And we shared our pain, our suffering, our loss.
They say that pain is the touchstone of spiritual growth, and for me that has certainly turned out to be true. But what I’ve learned is that there is a difference between struggling and suffering. Struggling is a good thing, an important thing, a necessary thing. It has helped me learn, and grow, and evolve into the person God intended me to be.
But suffering is optional.
And yet, I choose to suffer almost every day. Sometimes for a few moments, sometimes it goes on for hours. But when I remember that suffering is a choice, when I turn to God and to others to share my pain, my suffering subsides.
We founded our support group in May 2016, and this Monday night will celebrate our 289th meeting, in the midst of a period in which the world celebrates the holidays. We, a rag-tag group of misfits, the discarded, the broken. A gang of people who by all rights should not be able to celebrate anything. And yet, we thrive.
289 meetings. We thrive.
So, at least for me, at a time in the world and in my life when it would be so easy to focus on my wounds, instead I am choosing to focus on my blessings. What other choice to I really have if I want to thrive? And at the top of my list of my blessings is you. The miracle of us, and what we have found in one another. Brothers, sisters, a community, a family.
In the glow of this light, I wish and pray for you and your loved ones to have a happy and healthy Christmastime, no matter what your faith or religion. Please reach out to me or to one another if you are in need, or if you sense that someone else is in need. We will answer the call.
As for me, I’m always in need. At least a little.
Prayers and blessings to all for happy and healthy holidays, לשלום
Jeff
Rev. Jeff Grant, J.D., M.Div. (he, him, his)
Co-founder, Progressive Prison Ministries, Inc., Greenwich CT & Nationwide
Mailing: P.O. Box 1, Woodbury, CT 06798
Website: prisonist.org
Email: [email protected]
Office: 212-859-3512
Donations (501c3): http://bit.ly/donate35T9kMZ
Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/jeff-grant-woodbury-ct/731344
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/revjeffgrant
Media Relations: [email protected]
Speaker Information: https://www.espeakers.com/marketplace/profile/39107
not a prison coach, not a prison consultant
White Collar Support Group Blog: A holiday in hell – and I’m thankful for it. by Mike Neubig
Mike Neubig is a member of our White Collar Support Group that meets online on Zoom on Monday evenings.
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I don’t know how I can best communicate this experience.
Although my efforts will fall short, I have to try. So, here it goes.
As a kid, like others, every Christmas season felt like it was supposed to be a magical time where every dream would come true. I would watch all the holiday shows, count down the days until a break from school, lay under the tree watching the lights, and look forward to playing non-stop, all day. I felt as if our house was an isolated world where only I mattered and was to serve me the perfect Christmas. There is no perfection on earth, but kids certainly wish for it on this holiday.
As I got older, the realization sunk in that, although it is a very special day in religious terms, it was just December 25th on the calendar. I tried to fulfill the magical hopes and dreams of my own kids, but the day passed with less wonder as each year rolled by. After all, we are human, so each year human-like events occur that reduce any remaining hope for an out-of-body transformation. Once my own kids were past the age of believing in the magic themselves, it became even more difficult to avoid letting this time pass with minimal fanfare.
It wasn’t until I was fifty-two that events shifted in order to give me a holiday wake-up call. On August 21st of 2020, due to my criminal conviction, a judge sentenced me to spend a week at Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas in the county jail. At the time I thought, this reinforces that the magic I always hoped for came from a delusional kid that overestimated any power of a specific day.
I have never been so wrong about anything.
By the time I reported for my third “retreat”, as my family had grown to call it,(not because it was in any way easy, but because we had agreed to use it to help others as I did in church retreats), I was used to the dehumanizing procedures. Waiting to be booked, handcuffed, strip-searched, checked by the nurse, requesting needed meds, changing into “inmate” clothes, and sitting in a small room that was dirtier and smelled worse than any gas station restroom you will ever visit. All in preparation to be transferred to two more pods/cells, before my final twenty-one-man unit for the week.
It was Dec. 21st and I would get out the morning of Dec. 27th. So, I would be detained for the whole week of Christmas. Because we watch TV shows and movies about prison life, people tend to think that everyone is a heartless thug, a degenerate that needs to be removed from society, often violent, and can’t be trusted. Since this was my third stint in county jail, I already knew this wasn’t true. But, I certainly didn’t spend any time fantasizing about anything above a week of misery.
But, after the usual entrance procedures and making it to the final pod/cell, I was surprised at what I first saw. The powers that be at the jail had decided to plan a decorating contest to see which pod could put forth the best effort to transform forty years of peeling walls, cement floors and picnic tables into a construction paper and tape, winter wonderland. The motivation for each cell to engage would be for the top three cells to get pizza or fast food of their choice for dinner. Certainly a delicacy for anyone that has ever tasted the food in a county jail.
By the time I arrived though, the contest was over and my cell had not won one of the top three prizes. Non the less, I was blown away by their efforts. There were the same paper snowflakes we have all cut in elementary school hanging from every part of the ceiling. A makeshift green paper Christmas tree with a brown trunk standing on one of the cement tables while leaning against the wall. But what was most impressive to me was the Santas sleigh and reindeer that sat on the metal TV cabinet. The details of each reindeer, Santa’s body and face, as well as the sleigh and scenery, had to take at least six to eight hours of effort. It was not rudimentary in any form. It had to be completed by a few inmates with extensive art skills that gained joy from putting their talents to work
Activities that create escapes are invaluable amongst the slowest time one ever faces in county jail. The inmates who spent the time doing the decorating know that, in jail, the rules change by the minute. Who knew who would judge the decorating contest and the reward can be taken away in minutes because of one “cellies” negative behavior. Everyone knows any kind of reward in jail is a long shot at best.
In my opinion, the inmates didn’t work hard on the holiday decorations for pizza. They did it because they are the same kid that I once was, hoping to have the pain of life removed and replaced with magic during this one week of the year. It takes a lot more than being incarcerated to remove that from the human spirit. So, creating decorations across a dank, old jail cell held only intrinsic rewards. For me, their efforts were the first of many blessings to come. Much of my time that week was spent looking at the decorations in detail. Appreciating the efforts of those who we often think don’t have anything positive to offer, another reminder of how wrong we are.
My pod/cell was made up of a diverse group of men. By geographic location racial, socioeconomic and religious backgrounds. The range in age was eighteen to sixty-five with crimes that were largely due to drug possession or trafficking, breaking and entering, kidnapping, aggravated assault and others that are meant to economically feed their addictions. Therefore, the talk during downtime (which there is a lot of) is about each persons criminal case, their chance of getting out soon, the length of their eventual sentence, and of course, the loved ones and family they miss the most.
The majority of men had children at some age that would spend this holiday without them. Board and card games, as well as bartering for food trades, takes up as much time as possible. A slight bonus, there is a small TV playing, with limited channel options. The guards control the TV during their head-count routine, as the batteries in the remote could be used to smoke by the most “talented” inmates.
Coming in on this holiday week, I thought the TV shows of choice would be the usual sports or crime scene dramas that played eternally throughout the days. At any given time, five to seven of the twenty-one men in the pod/cell would watch a show. So, there was always a lot of room in front of the TV. But this week would prove to be different
As was always the case, the mainstream channels never fail to play old classics like Frosty the Snowman, Rudolph, or A Year Without a Santa Clause and so forth during this holiday week. 2020 would be no different. A few days before Christmas, around 8 PM, a commercial informed us that two episodes would be broadcast soon. As the shows started and word spread across the cell, at least 15-17 men crowded in front of the TV. More than I had seen for any other viewing event.
It is amazing, no matter where we watch the shows that are so tightly knit to our childhood, we can’t help but regress in our hearts and minds. As I saw the same 1960’s, rudimentarily manufactured characters that always made me happy and hopeful, watching them in county jail didn’t change that.
Closely seated together next to others on the cement picnic table, I looked at the smile on the face of the inmate next to me. This remote stranger and criminal enjoying the same show as I. It occurred to me, I would never have usually “mixed” with this group before. It brought a stirring awareness of equality to mind that would continue through the rest of the week.
Remove the skin color, the place of birth, the socioeconomic status of our parents, and other dividing factors, we are the same kid. None of us planned to be in a county jail at this time of our lives. Missing our families, county the minutes to be free. Yet, here we were, glad to have each other and heart full that together, we might be able to escape in our minds for a few minutes of magic once again. I learned that the human spirit seeks that at any level possible, regardless of the situation.
Due to the grind and routine of a county jail, days undoubtedly go by slowly. I had made it through the majority of the week and could begin to taste how good my release day would feel. As Christmas Eve approached, I had hoped that I could just ignore the family events I would be missing in order to pass time even faster. That is easier said than done.
It was Christmas Eve and I was able to get a few minutes on the pay-phone to talk to my wife and daughters. Which was the moment I had been most dreading since I learned the timing of my sentence. My wife had worked all day and as I had noticed looking out the windows, it was beginning to snow. She would have to drive and pick my daughter up from work, something I would have usually done when the weather was bad. As I got off the phone with them for what would be the last time on this Christmas Eve, I felt like a failure in every area of my life.
Walking across the cell and approaching the mostly frozen over windows, I gazed out at the falling snow and thought about the weight of this moment. Away from my wife and kids on Christmas Eve. That was bad enough, but I also had an additional challenge. One of the largest fears, stemming from my past life events and traumas, was the fear of not feeling safe/secure in my environment. It was something that I had discovered had permeated the majority of my life. It is also something that created an external focus and need for validation that led to the events that brought me here on this night. The lack of security didn’t stem from a threat on my life or violence. But it came from where it always had, fear that I wasn’t capable of relying on the internal strength that I had within myself.
Despite my best efforts to ignore the surroundings and the the voices replaying in my head of my wife and daughters, I had slipped into the lowest emotional level that I had hoped to avoid this week. I felt overwhelmed by sadness so I retreated to my bunk. I fought back the stomach pains and tried to pass time.
Whether it’s Christmas Eve or not, time in jail is one of the slowest humanity has witnessed. This night, time was extra slow and my anxiety was unusually high. My wife and daughters would soon be celebrating the holiday without me. I had always viewed the protection I provided them as contribution to make up for all the other foundational, healthy traits I lacked.
Deep down I knew that a time would come when my shortcomings would catch up to me, everyone would know that I was a fake, an empty vessel outwardly projecting confidence and intelligence with little substance to back it up. On this night it had not only caught up with me, but the family I loved would suffer as well. As I laid back in the rusted metal bunk attempting to ignore the back pain and lack of sleep, I looked around the cell at the activity of the other inmates.
There is no place that creates equality like jail. No matter what race, socioeconomic standing, religion, nationality or family support system… everyone is the same, societies most judged and deserving of whatever we get. After all, we all did something WRONG. So the one good thing was that, on this unexpected night I wasn’t alone. The events to come would not only change my belief in myself, but a belief in the kindness of humanity that I could never imagine.
Doing my best to pull myself from grave hopelessness, it was 8:30 pm and I remembered that an inmate had said that the movie “A Christmas Story” was going to be on TV. I heard a slight ruckus as many of the men were making themselves a viewing space in front of the small TV. When I had entered the pod/cell days earlier, a twenty-something-year-old man, who had told me he had been in and out of prison since he was thirteen for drug addiction, insisted I have the bottom bunk. He had witnessed my difficulties in climbing to the top one and said that he’d never make his dad climb up for the week, so he certainly wasn’t going to let me do it. That was only his first act of kindness to me that week.
Noticing my sadness after my earlier phone call home, the same young man had made me a makeshift chair in front of the TV from a plastic tote. He made me get out of bed and come over in front of the TV. Since the only thing to sit on in the cell is cement picnic tables bolted to the floor, inmates are adept at creating any semblance of comfort that they can. He and a few others had moved their ½ inch thick bed mats onto the cement floor in front of the TV as well, in preparation for the holiday film.
After making sure I was seated comfortably, he approached me and said he had saved a treat for me, a chocolate milk and candy bar. He said he knew it would be a tough night for me. The chocolate milk was given to us at breakfast as the only “treat” that represented any recognition of the Christmas Holiday. So, sacrificing his chocolate milk and nutty bar purchased at commissary was a gift of significant kindness. As with many other times where God speaks/acts through another human to one of us, I experienced an immediate feeling of love with an accompanying mood change.
The extreme sadness of being away from my family lifted due to the recognition of the power of the generous human spirit. There would be no return gift from me to the twenties-something drug addict that had spent most of his life incarcerated. I had nothing to give besides a sincere thanks and recognition of his act. On this holy night, God had spoken through him in the most glorious and unexpected way.
The rest of my Christmas Eve of 2020 was one I will never forget and will always be thankful for. I had never seen the movie The Christmas Story before, yet many of the men around me had. Regardless, near all of the men brought their bed mats in front of the TV. Some had saved treats as well in hope of finding something to celebrate on this day. Throughout the movie, I looked around me in order to look into the eyes of those who I was once afraid of and considered so different than me. Each face represented a different story that started with childhood dreams of Christmas magic, yet culminated with incarceration.
As the snow continued to fall and accumulate outside, the movie brought joy and nostalgia equally around the room. Together we laughed, talked about scenes that reminded us of our own childhood, and for at least a portion of the movie, felt like normal human beings.
One of my favorite parts of Christmas has always been going to bed feeling the satisfaction of giving and receiving the love that accompanies the holiday. What makes it even better, is to do so amongst family and loved ones. On this night, I felt the same. It wasn’t my immediate family I was with, nor anyone I would probably ever see again, but it was one of the greatest lessons and gifts I have ever learned. Humans take care of each other.
I also learned that, not only am I capable of building my own internal security and safety, but that God ALWAYS provides us with what we need in the gravest of situations. More importantly, he uses every person as an instrument to love and serve. From that point forward, I made a pact with myself that I would forever see value in every person, regardless of their background and circumstances. Also, I would open up myself to be the same instrument of love for others regardless of the time, place, or circumstance.
I do not intend for my Christmas story to pale in comparison to those who spend years incarcerated or in much worse circumstances. Instead, I hope that in reading it, others take away the same lesson that I did. The magic of this holiday will always be there, just as we wished as kids. The reason being the magic is God’s love. It never leaves because his people are always there.
Please think of those incarcerated and/or the less fortunate this holiday season. But don’t worry, they will take care of each other as will you and I.
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As Ruth Bader Ginsburg said, “Fight for the things that you care about but do it in a way that will lead others to join you.” Michael Neubig is a passionate professional who enjoys collaboratively fighting for a cause. That cause has always been equality in educational opportunity for everyone. Including those incarcerated and the justice-involved.
Michael is a former fifteen-year public education teacher, counselor, and administrator. Nationally recognized education consultant, author, influencer, and Education Technology Entrepreneur. Currently, he acts as a Sales and Marketing manager for a grant writing company. He has been married to his wife Caroline for 32 years and is the proud father of four successful daughters. He also provides public speaking and influence engagements for agencies engaged in Fair Chance, White-Collar Employment, or other areas of Justice Reform. Mike can be reached at michaelneubig.com.
White Collar Support Group Blog: Prison taught me the beauty, power, and complexity of freedom. by Craig Stanland
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Craig Stanland is a Member of our White Collar Support Group that meets online on Zoom on Monday evenings.
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There are seemingly countless ways to experience freedom. There are nuances and layers, and I’m fascinated by all of them.
That’s because freedom is one of my core values. A couple of years ago, that core value and my commitment to it was challenged.
I was fortunate to land a job after prison. That’s not an easy thing to do.
I worked the front desk at a gym, making $12 an hour. There were plenty of nights I’d skip dinner because I didn’t have enough money to take the subway to work and eat.
A far cry from my six-figure salary, plus commission, expense account, and car allowance.
Over time I became friends with many of the members, and we spoke in great detail about life and work, and of course, working out.
One of my friends learned about my corporate background; they knew what I was capable of in a corporate sales setting. I generated 21M in sales in my best year. I was consistently in the top 3 in the country.
And I hated it. There was no fulfillment; there was no joy. When asked if I liked my job, I replied the same every time,
“I don’t like my job, but I like what it affords me.”
The facade it provided, the cars, the watches, the extravagant dinners, multiple homes.
I was always chasing, and I was never satisfied. Deep down, I wanted to innovate, create my own company, write a book, and deliver a TED talk.
But I was too damn afraid to give up everything and create the life I wanted to create.
The gym didn’t pay a lot, but it provided the freedom to create the life I wanted.
That’s when I faced one of my most significant tests:
My new friend offered me a job back in the corporate world that would generate 350K/year.
I looked at my non-existent bank account, my skinny frame, and my rumbling stomach.
I thought about the watches I could buy and the new BMW I would lease. A new apartment in a cool neighborhood in NYC.
I spent my paycheck before I even got the offer letter.
What the hell was I doing? What was I thinking? Hadn’t I learned? What do I genuinely want to do?
Write. Speak. Utilize my experience in service to others. To have the freedom to create, innovate and carve my own path.
I turned the job down.
Because I was done chasing, I was done living in scarcity. I was done doing things that didn’t make me feel good.
I knew my definition of freedom, and I made my decision from the center of that definition.
It was singlehandedly one of the most empowering moments of my life.
When we live in alignment with our core values, we generate an energy that will not be denied. It flows from our very being and ripples out to every aspect of our lives.
We seize agency by the horns, and we, nobody else, are responsible for our lives.
All the distractions, all the BS, all the noise falls by the wayside when we know what we value and operate from the center of that.
Our decisions, and in turn our lives, become crystal clear.
That, to me, is freedom.
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My new book, “Blank Canvas, How I Reinvented My Life After Prison” is now available on Amazon.
I wrote this book from my heart, and I gave it everything I had.
My dream, my goal for this book is that it helps one person—the one person who feels right now how I once felt.
I’d be honored if you checked it out.
After hitting rock bottom, Craig Stanland was forced to make a choice: give up or rebuild. He thought he had “it all” until he lost sight of what’s truly important and made the worst decision of his life, losing everything along the way, including his own self-worth. Through the painful, terrifying process of starting over, Craig ultimately discovered that when you have nothing, anything is possible.
Today, Craig is an author, speaker, and Reinvention Architect. He specializes in working with people whose lives have fallen apart, helping them reinvent themselves by showing them how to rebuild their self-worth and create the extraordinary lives they’ve always wanted.
www.craigstanland.com
TEDx: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrkG9VQzqIo
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/craigstanland
IG: Craig_Stanland
Order “Blank Canvas” on Amazon.com here.
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Innovation in Compliance Podcast: Host Tom Fox Interviews Jeff Grant, 12-Step Program for White Collar Defendants, Nov. 30, 2021
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Big thanks to Tom Fox for having me on his podcast, Innovation in Compliance. Tom is a leader in the compliance world; kudos to him for seeing the relationship between corporate compliance and transformational services to support the defendants and their families, and help them to find new ethical pathways. In this conversation, we discussed in depth our online White Collar Support Group that meets on Zoom on Monday evenings. A must-listen if you are a regulator, compliance professional, attorney or someone in the throes of these problems. – Jeff
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Tom Fox read about Jeff Grant’s work in The New Yorker and was intrigued, so he invited him on this week’s show. Tom describes Jeff’s work as “an unusual professional passion”. Listeners will be inspired by Jeff’s story: what led to his arrest and prison sentence, his redemption, and how he now helps others recover.
Listen on Megaphone:
Show Notes:
“I Was the Problem”
Becoming a lawyer was the perfect fit for Jeff’s skill set and attitude, he tells Tom, but it was “very bad for me in terms of bipolar disorder and my alcohol and drug abuse.” He describes his descent into white-collar crime, his subsequent arrest and resignation from his law practice. A suicide attempt, intervention, and a stint in rehab all contributed to his ‘aha moment’ and the road to recovery. “I was the one who had been doing things wrong, and I didn’t really realize that the whole time,” he recalls. “…that was the turning point that I realized that I was the problem.”
Progressive Prison Ministries
Tom asks Jeff what led him to found Progressive Prison Ministries. Going to prison sober was the catalyst, Jeff replies. He stayed sober throughout his sentence, and on his release, he started to volunteer at criminal justice and drug and alcohol nonprofits. He also went to seminary and became an ordained minister. “I just wanted to help people who were in the same situation we were in,” he tells listeners. He had to go it alone, but he wanted others like him to have someone to turn to for support. “We started this ministry to serve and support people who have been prosecuted for white-collar crimes and their families… It’s people in isolation all over the country who have no one to talk to and no one who understands their plight… We offer them a helping hand both emotionally and spiritually, and also a lot of practical information as well.”
12-Step Approach
Jeff’s approach to helping white-collar offenders recover is based on the Alcoholics Anonymous 12-step program. Unlike AA meetings, however, his meetings are facilitated by leaders. The act of sponsoring someone is ministering to them, he says; your sponsor gives you a lot of advice, in a 12-step sort of way. “The spirit of the steps are there,” he tells Tom. What’s more powerful to him, however, is the fellowship. The Monday meeting is only a small part of it, he tells Tom. He explains how they match members together, and that they keep in contact throughout the week. “It’s like being a cop,” he remarks, “you’re on the job 24 hours a day, and being in recovery is being in recovery 24 hours a day… So this is really a 24-hour a day support network.”
Supporting the Families
Tom asks, “How does the family work into white-collar recovery?” They often have it worse than the defendant, Jeff answers, because they are usually unaware of what the defendant has been doing, and reality hits them “between the eyes with something like an arrest or the FBI showing up at the door.” He comments on the high incidence of divorce and family estrangement and laments that recovery is not advanced even in his network. However, they welcome everyone who needs them, he points out. “We want to provide a place of support and comfort for anybody who doesn’t have a built-in support network or is estranged from their support networks.”
Supporting Attorneys and GrantLaw PLLC
“I was really intrigued by some of the information on your website, one of which was that the white-collar support group can help attorneys struggling to cope with a broken justice system,” Tom comments. He asks Jeff to explain more about this. We try to help attorneys understand the humanity of white-collar offenders, Jeff responds. “We try to bring a full picture to a very complicated situation that people tend to want to paint with a very broad brush.” He is happy that more defense attorneys, prosecutors, judges, and probation officers want to learn how to integrate Jeff’s theology to be “more just and more merciful and perhaps more lenient” in their dealings with white-collar defendants. He and Tom discuss his own law practice. His entire practice now is with white-collar attorneys, he says. He shares examples of how he helped defendants revise their strategy by asking the right questions. Tom asks him to advise attorneys who may be struggling themselves with the same problems he did. The first step is to admit you have a problem, he says. He outlines the avenues – both personally and professionally – where help is available.
Resources
Jeff Grant on LinkedIn | Twitter
Grant Law
Prisonist.org
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White Collar Support Group Blog: When is the Right Time? by Bill Livolsi
Bill Livolsi is a Member of our White Collar Support Group that meets online on Zoom on Monday evenings.
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When Is The ‘Right’ Time?
Anyone who has been involved with the criminal justice system asks these questions:
What’s the right time to tell my family?
What is the right time to tell my employer?
What’s the right time to tell my friends and colleagues? What’s the right time in a social setting?
Is there ever a right time? How do I tell anyone?
I have come to believe that these conversations need to happen, sooner rather than later. The topic needs to be broached, otherwise it’s a sack of bricks we silently carry everywhere we go. And it gets heavier and heavier with the passage of time.
Keeping secrets is corrosive, but these are hard conversations to have.
We are reluctant to have the difficult conversations surrounding our criminal justice issues. We’re afraid of rejection, we’re afraid of judgment and we’re afraid of being ostracized. All pretty normal fears.
Anyone who knows me knows that I believe in disclosing our situation to our employer, or prospective employer, sooner rather than later. I feel that keeping it a secret is in the long run counter-productive to our employment prospects. When they find out, and they will find out, having kept it hidden only reinforces the notion that we are, among other things, untrustworthy.
What about the numerous other situations we’ll encounter in our lives? Let me share a story from this past week at work.
I was paired for a day-long task with another one of my coworkers. We had never worked together before. The task at hand gave us ample opportunity to have a conversation while we were working.
As we were comparing our relative experience with our employer they told me how grateful they were to have this job because it was so difficult to find work as they were on federal probation.
BOOM, there it was!
Here I was thinking of ways I was going to broach the topic with them (at some yet to be determined ‘right time’) and they got there first. I felt good that they were comfortable sharing this part of their life with me. Then I felt a sense of relief as I shared my situation. As we continued our conversation throughout the afternoon we found that we had so much in common irrespective of the differences in our convictions. It was a really good day.
I’ve been thinking about this experience and here are some thoughts I’ve come away with.
Prior to that moment did I have any inkling they had a felony conviction? No! And the same is true for them about me, they had no idea. Did we have large F’s stamped on our foreheads? Obviously not. Yet we both were silently keeping the same secret, until we weren’t.
It felt very good to be able to talk openly about our experience free of judgment and not having to hide something so impactful in our lives.
Too often I forget that there are hundreds of thousands of men and women in our society carrying around the same guilt, shame and fear of judgement that I am. They are the checkout person at the grocery store, they cut my hair, they’re my plumber, they’re my electrician, they are the men and women I work with.
I am very mindful of the fact that not every experience that I will have, or you will have, is going to be pleasant. I have had plenty of unpleasant ones in the past. Sometimes my worst fears will be realized; I will be judged, or rejected.
So, is there ever a right time? And with whom do I share? I don’t really know for sure, but I do know this much – the more I hold it inside, the more energy I expend keeping my secret, my sense of isolation will never truly end.
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Bill Livolsi is a Life Coach supporting the white collar justice community and a volunteer with Progressive Prison Ministries. He helps men and women facing prosecution for white collar and non-violent crimes navigate their journey – including rebuilding their lives after prison. He was prosecuted for a white collar crime and spent 13 months in Federal prison. Bill can be reached at whitecollarcoaching.com.
Rich Roll Podcast: MasterClass on Addiction & Recovery, feat. Jeff Grant, Ep. 644, Nov. 25, 2021
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Huge thanks to Rich Roll for including my visit to his podcast (Ep. 440) in his MasterClass on Addiction & Recovery. What a gift and blessing to be among these incredible interviewees to share our stories and offer hope to others suffering from the disease of addiction. – Jeff
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Watch on YouTube:
The third in an ongoing series of curated deep dives, today’s show is a masterclass on addiction & recovery, featuring personal stories of sobriety from past guests & wisdom from lauded mental health experts.
Guests featured in this episode (all hyperlinked to their respective episodes) include:
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RRP 623: Anna Lembke, MD On The Neuroscience Of Addiction
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RRP 505: Dan Peres: From Opioid Slave To Sober Salvation
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RRP 593: Jessica Lahey On The Addiction Inoculation
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RRP 626: David Choe On Beauty & Brokenness
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RRP 471: Dr. Judd Brewer On Treating Addiction With Mindfulness
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RRP 341: Amy Dresner On Getting Dirty & Staying Clean
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RRP 440: Jeff Grant: From Addiction & Incarceration To Prison Ministry
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RRP 188: Dr. Gabor Maté On Why Addiction Is Not A Choice
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RRP 248: Charlie Engle: From Crack Addict To Running The Sahara
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RRP 326: The Misadventures Of A Professional Struggler: Mishka Shubaly Just Wants To Be Better
To learn more & peruse the full show notes, go here 👉🏾 https://bit.ly/richroll644 ✌🏼🌱 – Rich
LISTEN / SUBSCRIBE TO THE PODCAST Apple Podcasts: http://bit.ly/rrpitunes Spotify: http://bit.ly/rrpspotify Google: http://bit.ly/rrpgooglepods Meal Planner: http://meals.richroll.com Voicing Change Book: http://richroll.com/vc Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/RichRollPod… Newsletter: http://bit.ly/rollcallemail CONNECT WITH RICH ✩ Website – http://richroll.com ✩ Rich Roll Podcast – https://richroll.com/all-episodes/ ✩ Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/richroll/ ✩ Twitter – https://twitter.com/richroll ✩ Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/richrollfans ✩ Strava – https://www.strava.com/athletes/14443… ✩ Memoir: Finding Ultra – https://www.richroll.com/shop/books/f… ✩ Meals – http://meals.richroll.com ✩ Cook – The Plantpower Way – https://www.richroll.com/shop/books/t… ✩ Italian! – The Plantpower Way: Italia – https://www.richroll.com/shop/books/t… ✩ Support – https://www.patreon.com/richroll
VIDEO PRODUCED AND EDITED BY DAN DRAKE https://www.dandrake333.com/ ORIGINAL PODCAST CLIPS FILMED AND EDITED BY BLAKE CURTIS & MARGO LUBIN https://www.blakecurtis.net/
00:00:00 – Intro
00:04:12 – Anna Lembke
00:13:44 – Dan Peres
00:23:56 – Jessica Lahey
00:33:24 – David Choe
00:39:55 – Judd Brewer
00:49:30 – Amy Dresner
00:57:50 – Jeff Grant
01:07:31 – Gabor Mate
01:19:05 – Charlie Engle
01:28:29 – Mishka Shubaly
NEW TO RICH? Hi I’m Rich Roll. I’m a vegan ultra-endurance athlete, author, podcaster, public speaker & wellness evangelist. But mainly I’m a dad of four. If you want to know more, visit my website or check out these two the NY Times articles: http://bit.ly/otillonyt , http://bit.ly/vegansglam
I LOVE MAIL! SEND IT HERE: 29617 Agoura Rd. Agoura Hills, CA 91301 #richroll #richrollpodcast
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Jeff Grant Elected to Board of Legal Action Center in NYC.
New York, NY, November 8, 2021: I am honored to have been elected to the Board of Directors of the Legal Action Center, NYC.
The Legal Action Center (LAC) uses legal and policy strategies to fight discrimination, build health equity, and restore opportunity for people with arrest and conviction records, substance use disorders, and HIV or AIDS. LAC uses a multi-faceted approach, including impact litigation, legal services, education, and policy advocacy.
LAC was founded by The Vera Institute of Justice in 1973 to break the cycle of addiction and crime. When the HIV epidemic tore apart communities already affected by addiction and incarceration, we expanded our mission to help improve the lives of men and women trying to cope with these multiple crises.
The Problem
Decades of punitive criminal justice and drug policies have led to over-incarceration and failure to invest in community healthcare. The results of these failed policies have devastated lives, communities and perpetuated systemic inequities on a massive scale. Today, 1 in every 3 American adults has a conviction record and the disproportionate impact on low-income individuals of color is unmistakable. Tens of thousands of laws exist to block people with histories of conviction from accessing basic necessities, such as employment, housing and education, essentially sentencing people to a lifetime of poverty. Millions more Americans cannot access or afford the health care they need, and individuals with substance use disorder and mental illness are often criminalized instead of treated due to the lack of affordable, accessible treatment options and discriminatory insurance barriers.
Direct Legal Services
Our free legal services are offered to New York residents facing discrimination based on their arrest or conviction records, substance use disorder, HIV, or AIDS status.
LAC provides free legal services to approximately 1,500 individuals in New York every year. We help people overcome discrimination, get fair treatment in the workplace, protect their HIV privacy rights, access the mental health and substance use disorder care they need, and attain jobs, homes, benefits, voting rights, and more. Our services range from brief advice to informal advocacy and full representation.
Most services are offered via our telephone hotline, which is staffed by paralegals under attorney supervision. We also provide services offsite at community-based organizations. LAC does not accept walk-in clients.
We work with clients to seal cases, correct background screening errors, and gather evidence of positive change to increase their chances of obtaining employment, housing, and other life essentials. We also represent clients when they are illegally denied these opportunities. For clients with HIV or substance use disorders, we provide education and representation to address privacy violations and discrimination – whether in health care settings, employment, insurance coverage, the criminal legal and family regulation (child welfare) systems, or elsewhere.
Policy Advocacy
We work with policymakers and advocacy partners in Washington, DC, New York, and other states across the country to advance laws and regulations that eliminate discriminatory policies, protect access to health care, and promote opportunity.
LAC works to protect our constituents from discrimination by fighting to change laws and regulations at the national, state, and local levels.
In this way, we work to break down the barriers that keep millions of people from the dignity and equity they deserve, and we advocate for reforms and funding that increase their access to opportunity. All of our policy advocacy is rooted in a health-first approach that aims to shift the historically punitive and racist response to drug and criminal justice policies to one that stresses the need to expand treatment, promote community-building, and support restorative justice.
Training and Technical Assistance
We provide training and resources to educate directly-affected individuals, providers, attorneys, policymakers, advocates, and other stakeholders about current laws, best practices and much-needed policy reforms.
We conduct our trainings in-person in New York City and other locations when requested, as well as through online webinars.
Likewise, we provide technical assistance nationally in response to requests from policymakers, public officials, advocacy organizations and direct service providers who need help navigating laws and policies and who want information about model programs, practices or policies related to our priority areas.
We also participate on panels and educational discussions hosted by partner organizations to share our expertise related to our issue areas.
Impact Litigation
Our impact litigation establishes important legal precedents to fight discrimination and promote opportunity.
Coalitions and Collaboration
We believe in the power of partnerships, and by leading and working in coalition with diverse advocacy partners, we magnify our voices and amplify our impact.
Working with lawmakers, officials from health, mental health, substance use, labor, and justice agencies, as well as advocates, service providers, and directly-impacted individuals throughout the country, LAC engages in cooperative efforts to empower our constituencies and advance sound public policy related to our issue areas.
For example, during the run-up to the Affordable Care Act (ACA), LAC helped form the Coalition for Whole Health – a group of over 100 national and state mental health and substance use disorder organizations that is co-chaired by LAC Director/President Paul Samuels. The Coalition, which continues to operate to improve access to mental health and substance use disorder care ten years after the ACA became law, was instrumental in securing provisions in the ACA that require coverage of mental health and addiction benefits at parity.
LAC also founded and co-leads the Coalition of Reentry Advocates (CoRA), which is a New York State coalition of advocates that works to promote policies that help people overcome the challenges of reentry and reduce recidivism and its associated costs. Similarly, the Alternatives to Incarceration/Reentry Coalition in New York, which LAC has led since 1984, works to ensure that people who have had contact with the criminal legal system in the state have a fair chance to succeed as full community members. The ATI/Reentry Coalition is comprised of 11 nonprofits that collectively offer effective and groundbreaking services to reduce crime and break the cycle of incarceration, while saving tax dollars and strengthening communities statewide.
Some of our other main collaborations include: Parity at 10, a campaign uniting local and national advocates in 10 states to pursue full enforcement of the Parity Act, with the ultimate goal of ensuring that the law lives up to its promise nationwide; the Addiction Solutions Campaign, a coordinated effort to leverage five organizations’ collective expertise across research, policy, and communications to tackle the escalating overdose crisis in our country; FFACTS, a group of individuals whose friends and/or family members have been directly impacted by substance use disorder and mental illness and the lack of access to care for these health issues; New York State’s End the Epidemic Coalition, which works to end the AIDS epidemic in the state through research, advocacy, prevention, and treatment; and Clean Slate New York, an initiative co-led by LAC and the Community Service Society of New York to achieve automatic expungement in the state and reduce the barriers associated with a conviction record.
LAC also has active ongoing pro bono programs with major law firms that support our litigation efforts by co-counseling cases in both state and federal courts.
New York Office: 225 Varick St, 4th Floor, New York, NY 10014, T (212) 243-1313, F (212) 675-0286
Washington DC Office: 810 1st Street, NE, Suite 200, Washington, DC 20002, T (202) 544-5478, F (202) 544-5712
Reuters: Why Lawyers in Trouble Shun Treatment — at the Risk of Disbarment, by Jenna Greene
Jeff Grant, featured in this article, is a Member of our White Collar Support Group, that meets online on Zoom on Monday evenings.
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Reprinted from Reuters.com, November 9, 2021
(Reuters) – The statistics have become depressingly familiar: Lawyers have significantly higher levels of problem drinking, substance abuse, anxiety and depression when compared with the general population.
The toll isn’t just personal. Clients can suffer if their counsel is impaired. The question is, what to do about it? How should bar authorities respond when a lawyer’s misconduct stems from addiction or mental health issues?
A new report by the New York State Bar Association on lawyer well-being dives into these questions and the feasibility of diversion programs for lawyers with substance abuse or mental health issues and who are facing disciplinary actions as a result.
These programs allow a court to stay an investigation or proceeding and direct the lawyer to an appropriate treatment and monitoring program. The report authors urge such options to be expanded to all disciplinary proceedings and applied “in the broadest possible fashion.”
It sounds enlightened and compassionate — but making it work is likely to prove challenging.
New York has had a diversion program in place since 2016, but the report authors note that few lawyers have taken advantage of it.
The Albany-based Appellate Division, Third Department, for example, “has seen only a handful of diversion applications over the past five years, with only one such proceeding reaching successful fruition,” according to the report.
Why don’t more lawyers see this as a lifeline? After all, it could be a chance to enter recovery and halt a potentially ruinous disciplinary action. As the report authors noted, potential beneficiaries “include the impaired lawyer, the lawyer’s family, partners, employees and clients, as well as the courts and the legal profession as a whole.”
But lawyers tend to be reluctant to seek help out of a deep-rooted fear of professional consequences, Patrick Krill, an attorney who advises law firms on well-being matters, told me.
“The message from the beginning of the law school experience is ‘Thou shalt not practice law while impaired,’” Krill said. “There’s less discussion about the disease of addiction.”
The result is a pervasive fear of being “perceived as impaired” that makes lawyers disinclined to let anyone know, he continued. “They keep it hidden and it grows and gets worse.”
That’s what happened to Jeff Grant.
“I was an alcoholic and a drug addict and living double life,” Grant, who regained his New York law license earlier this year after losing it in 2002, told me. (I wrote previously about Grant here.)
There was no diversion program when his world as head of a small firm in Mamaroneck, New York, started to fall apart 20-odd years ago. I asked if he thought such program might have made a difference or prevented his downfall, which culminated in serving 14 months in federal prison for fraudulently obtaining a loan.
“I’d like to believe it would,” he said. But at the same time, Grant also said that “nothing was going to get through to me before hitting bottom.”
In the roughly 9,000 (yes, 9,000) recovery meetings he’s attended in the last 19 years, he added, “I’ve never met anyone who was ready to get help before hitting bottom.”
The report’s authors — dozens of lawyers served on the task force that created the 167-page document — recognize this is an obstacle.
As is, the program “contemplates a lawyer ready, willing and able to seek treatment at the time when the disciplinary investigation or proceeding remains pending,” they wrote. “All too often, the attorney’s threshold acknowledgment of impairment or condition comes only after the disciplinary process has resolved disfavorably.”
In other words, it happens when the lawyer hits bottom and it’s too late for a diversion. (Though successful treatment can certainly help a lawyer get reinstated.)
Anecdotally, the report’s authors said they found many attorneys prefer to “take their chances” with the outcome of a disciplinary investigation rather than admitting to a problem. After all, most professional misconduct complaints are ultimately dismissed or resolved via confidential letters of advisement or admonitions.
Asking for a diversion means lawyers “not only expose themselves to the vulnerability of raising a mental or physical health condition or impairment, but could also be subject to the rigors and requirements of a monitoring program for a period of a year or more. Further, while a diversion order is confidential, some attorneys may still be reluctant to have any order issued that addresses their underlying condition or impairment.”
Both Krill and Grant, while supportive of robust diversion alternatives, also urge more attorney outreach and education about substance abuse and mental health issues starting in law school and continuing via mandatory CLE.
“If we as lawyers knew from day one if you start to experience mental health or substance abuse problems that there is track available to get help, and that it will insulate your (law) license somewhat from disciplinary problems,” Krill said, “I think we’d see a lot more” lawyers seeking help.
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